The Story of How I met my husband………..

By | on 17th January 2014 | 23 Comments

This year is a year of big celebrations in our family, including our 5th wedding anniversary and I have been reminiscing over how I met my husband and thought I would share our little story with you.

 Turkey09 anf wedding260809 062

I had been coming to Turkey for a year or two before I met my husband and knew all the stories and seen all the summer workers in action, romancing the girls promising them love and then at change over as the girls left crying promising to return and changing their FB status to in a relationship, the boy’s picked up the next girl or met their love from last year………..

I wasn’t interested at the time in a relationship and especially a long distance one with some bloke I met on holiday.

I am a believer in Destiny, Kismet, what is meant to be and so on, but I have never been one for love at first sight, unless of course it was a horse then I do believe!!

I used to holiday with my friend and stay at her parents apartment and we knew a lot of the regular summer workers and my friend and her family were well known.

On this particular holiday in 2006 my friends Gran passed away during our holiday. After speaking with her family she decided there was nothing she could do and the funeral would be after we returned home and so decide to stay and finish the holiday.

You can imagine that day my friend didn’t want to sit on the beach or do any holiday like things. So we decided to take a walk, we thought the direction we took would be quiet away, from boat trip sellers and any other hustlers.

As we were walking along we came to a quiet beach and two boys where walking along towards us, we instantly recognised one of the boys who we would have rather not have met that day, he likes to talk and we knew he wouldn’t pass quickly.

The other boy caught my attention, he wasn’t bad looking but what had interested me was when he spoke he told us they were just talking about comics and aliens, an odd topic but what interested me was his English was very good, most the summer workers can speak English but often not so well.

my turkish husband

Picture taken the Year we met

We chatted for a few minutes and then the boy we knew declared we should all have a picnic, looking to my friend she agreed as we knew that most likely he wouldn’t take no for an answer. Off he went leaving us with the other boy (my now husband) to get some food and drinks.

He seemed nice enough and spoke well, but here was the problem he didn’t shut up! On he went doing little psychology tests he thought fun. He was a bit tiring and we couldn’t wait to get away.

We really wanted to head back the way we came but as they were going that way after the picnic we said we were going to continue our walk. Which turned into a bit of hike, we got lost and ended up half way out the town and had to walk back via the main road. But it did help my friend sort her head out.

Unfortunately the boys had asked us if we would be out in Bar street that night and we had kind of dodge the question. When we headed out we thought we could avoid them but there they were looking for us and we ended up sitting with them for a while. If you know Turkish boys especially summer workers they can be a bit persuasive or should I say they annoy you enough till you sit with them to shut them up and get rid of them!

We said one drink then we had to leave, well we had a couple and then my now husband asked if he could talk to me privately. Now up till this point really I didn’t think he had any interest in me, most the boys liked my friend and as I wasn’t in the market so to speak I hadn’t really been thinking along those lines.

I agreed to speak with him briefly wondering what he could possible want to say to me, well he told me he liked me blah blah and then would you believe he tried to kiss me, well he was lucky that night as I didn’t slap him………… but at that point I walked away. I did agree to pass on my email so he could chat and practise his English (yeah right!!)

We did have some luck that night, he told us he was leaving as he had just finished his teaching degree and was going to travel to take up his new position, as a teacher in the city of Van in the very east of Turkey.

Thinking that would let us finish our our holiday in peace.

I found I was so wrong, so very very wrong……………………

I should mention I did give him my number as well, I am soft touch all right or maybe my sub conscience was working for me who knows!

But he texted me while I was still in Turkey, saying the normal stuff, I like you blah blah I answered saying I wasn’t interested but happy to be friends and help him with his English.

When I got home, it was like I had a long distance stalker, he would email me and eventually persuaded me to chat on MSN (now dead and gone)

I did enjoy our chats and getting pictures of his first day at school and getting to know him but still I wasn’t interested in a relationship with him.

His First day as a Teacher

His First day as a Teacher

He would say things like send me a kiss or your my girlfriend why you going out etc I got fed up I told him to take a hike and leave me alone, blocked his emails and ignored his texts and calls.

But he made up a new email pretending to be someone I knew and I had to block that one and whenever I got drunk I would call him, what was I doing!!

This went on for a full year, he told me he would be waiting all summer till I arrived as he knew I would I would come on holiday but not when. I told him if he came near me I would call the Jandarma!!

Well we arrived and like a bad smell there he was grrrr, I told him I would call the Jandarma if he didn’t stay stay away.

Well fate had it in for me again didn’t she, she couldn’t just stay out of it!!

It seemed death was to bring us together for second time……………

My Mum called me to say my little cat had been run over and died, I was off course very upset and my Mum more so as she was looking after him while I was away.

So I did what was best to do in these circumstances, my friend and I went out on a serious mission that night to get proper drunk.

By this point my husband had given up, he had decided he would move on from this crazy Scottish girl he had invested all his time in and find someone a little easier to deal with.

What did I go and do I drunk texted him and he turned up at the little bar we were hiding in away from him!!

And so the night went on and it was time for home, we staggered home with our escort of my husband and his friend, my friend went into the house while I spoke with my husband. I said good night, went to open the door and my friend had locked it…….. I was locked out, I couldn’t get her up without waking the whole neighbourhood and my phone had just ran out of battery.

I had no idea what to do, so I went running after my husband and explained the situation and we spent the night sitting on a bench at the beach talking and had an early breakfast at the bakery until my friend woke up and noticed I was gone and let me back in again.

Well from that night onwards in 2007 we were an item. A few days later I found myself sitting on a bus bound for his parents home to meet the family!! I had gone from not wanting nothing to do with him to meeting the parents in only a few days. It was wrecking meeting them all but luckily they liked me and as they say the rest was history.

Meeting the family a little nervous!

Meeting the family a little nervous!

My husband told me that from the moment he met me he knew he would marry me, that he wanted the picnic so he could talk to me the silly questions he was asking was so he could talk to me. I have no idea really if I did like him from the start or not, I think somehow I did and the year we spent talking was a great way to start our relationship.

As my husband often says if the fire was quick to burn it would have burned out quickly, but because our fire was slow to burn it will burn for a long time.

I am forever grateful that he never gave up on me, I would have missed out on finding the love of my life and I am so happy we will be celebrating our 5th Wedding Anniversary and 8 years together.

How did you meet your Partner I would love to hear your story?

© 2014 – 2015, Kerry Arslan. All rights reserved.

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23 Responses to “The Story of How I met my husband………..”

  1. 17th January 2014

    Susan Reply

    I believe in Kismet too and think that there were higher powers involved in my husband (who is from Turkey) and I (who am American) meeting at a night club in NYC 25 years ago. We both were not going to go that night but something told me to go and his friends made him go. He came to the United States after graduating from hotel tourism high school to learn English. It was love at first sight for both of us at the night club and we started dating and the rest is history. We have been together for 25 years, married for 23 of those years and have two amazing teenage daughters. We have gone through rough patches with the differences in culture etc but our marriage has never been stronger and we are still madly in love. I cannot imagine life without him! I know is sounds corny but we complete each other.

    • 20th January 2014

      Kerry Arslan Reply

      Lovely to hear your story Susan and that you have had a long and happy marriage. I thinks ups and downs are part of it all, people are all to quick now to throw in the towel, thinking the slightest problem is the end of the world, they don’t seem to understand it takes work and commitment to build a great marriage. Wishing you lots more happy years for you both. Thanks for sharing x

  2. 17th January 2014

    Nina Başar Reply

    Kerry, what a lovely story, and actually you made me giggle quite a bit because it reminded me of my marriage or maybe I should say courtship. I am one of those people that met my Turkish husband online. But I knew him via a FB game, for a couple of years before we really started talking. Then after I started really talking to him we talked on skype, IM and was texting. I just thought he was crazy and thinking that a long distant relationship would work, him in Turkey and me in the states. To make a long story short, after 2 years, I gave in and said ok lets try this, and yes I did break up with him 3 different times because of the long distant thing. At one point he was suppose to come to the states for work, but that ended up falling through so I said fine, I am coming to you….2 hours later I was packed and heading for the airport. I have been here with him since Aug 2011(got here on his birthday) and I have only been home one time since than. We have now been married for a little over a year and it was the best thing that I ever did for myself. Like Susan, we have also gone through our rough patches, but we always work them out and that is the important thing. I love him more and more each day. Life with him is amazing, and I can not wait to see what the future will bring for us.

    • 20th January 2014

      Kerry Arslan Reply

      Nina, what a wonderful story meeting online and then taking the risk and coming here. Its wonderful to hear such a lovely romantic story. I wish you all the best for the future and many happy years xx

  3. 17th January 2014

    Nilgun Mandal Reply

    Such a lovely courtship! I am glad that you found the love of your life, here’s to a lifetime of happiness together. Nice senelere!

  4. 19th January 2014

    Mary Reply

    Loved this post! I can relate to it so much I laughed out loud at the you and your friend going out to get seriously drunk bit of course what else could you can take the girl out of Scotland and all that! How unprepared where you meeting the family!! I suppose you did not have time to really think about it! Wishing you many more happy years together 🙂

    • 20th January 2014

      Kerry Arslan Reply

      Completely unprepared, I forgot to add in I had to do a bit quick clothes shopping to adjust my wardrobe from holiday to meet the family!! I am also from a small family so with all my Husband’s family crowded in for an evening I was entirely lost!

  5. 3rd June 2014

    Melena Reply

    I really loved reading your story! How sweet! I wish you many happy years together! 🙂

  6. 20th June 2014

    Elaine Reply

    Parts of this story are a bit disturbing… stalking, getting locked out, meeting parents so soon. I’ve met plenty of guys overseas that have this same stalker approach to courtship, and that leads to possessive and controlling behavior. It also sounds like you liked the attention and led him on quite a bit by continuing to text back. I’m happy it seemed to have worked out. There’s plenty to this story that scares the crap out of me and doesn’t seem like the basis for good relationship.

  7. 5th July 2014

    Eat with Me Istanbul Reply

    So glad to have discovered your blog! I related to many of your experiencnes. Turkish men are very persistant and patient in a good way. I will follow you up. Thanks.

  8. 28th August 2014

    Newly Turk-ified Reply

    Love your post and site! So happy I stumbled across it. I have been dating a Turkish man for about two months now. Things are moving fast, fast, FAST. But I love his family-oriented culture and habit of ALWAYS telling me how much he cares for me. *Fingers crossed* it works out… That washing dishes post was extremely helpful! My man returns to the states (where he and I both live) next week after holiday in Turkey… and he’s bringing home his MOTHER for a month! I’m determined to impress her. I’ll continue devouring your posts… any and all advice is much appreciated. Cheers!

    • 25th September 2014

      Kerry Arslan Reply

      Good luck with having his Mother stay with you, if you need to know anything give me a shout, I think it will be more a culture shock for her than you!

  9. 3rd September 2014

    Maria Reply

    Hi Kerry!
    My name is Maria,
    probably u won’t remember me. A few months ago I was asking u a few things on your blog. I’m Spanish and met my Turkish boyfriend on Internet…does it ring the bell?
    Well….things have been turning serious now and we want to take a step ahead. I’m living in Ireland currently. We want to try to live here for a while before we decide to go back to Turkey. The problem is we have to get married in order for him to be able to enter the country.
    I’ve been searching on line for information but I’m very confused. I was hoping u could give me some guidance on this matter.
    Do we have to get married in Ireland or Turkey? after so…can he come here straight away or we have to wait?
    Is it possible for him to work in Ireland wit an EU spouse or needs to apply for different visa? and if so, could it be possible that the visa might be denied?
    I know is a bit cheeky to ask u all that…but I would really appreciate if u share ur experience with me….I’m so lost right now!!!!

    Thanks a million!!!

    • 25th September 2014

      Kerry Arslan Reply

      Maria, sorry for the late reply I have been in one place and then the next and now we are settled I can sit down and answer comments. I am not sure if you have found a solution or not. I am unsure of the procedure but if you are on facebook I recommend joining this group UK National for wives with Turkish husbands or partners, now not to worry about being Spanish because the group has grown and we can’t change the name! I will look out for your request and add you. Now go here and ask there are a lot of girls with a lot of knowledge on this and will be more than happy to help. Kerry x

  10. 21st November 2014

    Monica Reply

    Hi Kerry,

    I am so glad I found this site. I met my Turkish prince in 2012, and we have been in this long distance relationship for 2 years (I live in Toronto, Canada). He is also a teacher! I enjoy reading all your stories and your experiences. I wish you and your wonderful husband many many years happy together!

    • 22nd November 2014

      Kerry Arslan Reply

      Thank you for your kind words Monica. I wish you and your prince many happy years together. x

  11. 10th August 2015

    Emma Reply

    Hı kerry ı have just come across your blog ı love it so honest and funny I’m also married to a turk/kurd 7 years now and have two beautiful children it hasn’t all be plain sailing but it’s an amazing experience with a totally different culture but i wouldn’t change anything my in laws are amazing they treat me like a daughter looking forward to reading some more of your blogs keep them coming.xx

  12. […] Article: How we met […]

  13. 22nd April 2016

    LDRgirl Reply

    oh hello… I am now in a relationship with a Turkish guy, and he is kinda not romantic at all. I read all the words you wrote above, and somehow the story was just like what happened to me. But I met him online 4 years ago, and we fought sometime, and i ever blocked him, but he back to me…. at the first time, he didn’t try to build a relationship like dating, but we keep talking until he said sorry for everything he has done in the past and so did I. And he back to me now…. can I trust him?

    • 2nd May 2016

      Kerry Arslan Reply

      It is hard to know who we can trust and who we can’t. Sometimes you can know someone for years and years and yet the still break our trust. I think you can only go with how you feel and I mean not in your head and heart but in your stomach. That feeling that tells you it’s ok. I think only time really tells as well. Some relationships work some don’t. You just have to enjoy the time with each other and see how far it takes you. Don’t look to the future to much x

  14. 17th July 2017

    Doaa Ahmed Reply

    Hi Dear ,

    Nice story , Really i am as a muslim have been reading alot about islam history and the huge islamic heritage the turkish land had , i loved more and more about turkey . now in 2017 i am thinking seriously to live in turkey and get job there and i have started learning turkey now beside my master’s thesis that i hope to finish soon .and Hopefully find my man there turkish decent man 🙂 with good ethics and heritage .. I hope destiny make that true for me .
    And i really liked all your comments . hope to meet good friends like you soon 😉
    Your prayers 🙂

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